iAtheist

Surviving Stargate

by on Nov.29, 2010, under Personal, Uncategorized

Congratulations on being selected to join the SGC! There are some things you need to know to survive in this very dangerous and challenging environment.

  1. The best way to survive in the SGC is being a member of SG:1.  Of course the number of open spots on the team makes this tactic the most difficult one.
  2. Promotions are awesome for other people.  Unless you are Samantha Carter taking a promotion is very dangerous.
  3. If you are picked to be the leader of SG:X where X is not 1, you are almost guaranteed to die.
  4. Don’t be Daniel Jackson
  5. Don’t get captured by Ba’al
  6. Don’t be on the team sent to back up SG:1
  7. Don’t fall in love with Daniel Jackson
  8. Don’t volunteer to host a Tok’ra
  9. Don’t be a General (See #2)
  10. Don’t join the NID
  11. Don’t let Oneall consider you a son
  12. Don’t fall in love with Teal’c
  13. Go to Atlantis
  14. If in Atlantis, don’t be a Colonel (See #2)
  15. Don’t be Dr. Weir
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